- Shia LeBoeuf
"When engaged in a hostile takeover, it is better to plant colonists in the Marketing Departments of the enemy than to negotiate with impudent shareholders: just butcher those who oppose your every whim"
- Niccolo Macchiavelli's 'The CEO'
I wouldn't call Frank Skinner dull, exactly. He just exudes an air of comfortableness, like an old, old sweater-vest. However, the way he sits like a squirrel gets on my rag, as does his obsession with George Formby (I had to sit through a 58 minute documentary on the celebrated racist presented by Skinner because my…
Oh, I forgot about the whole racism thing. You know the world is fucked when a mere headbutt is more memorable than the general wash of fascism that pervades the world of professional football. When I was in France over Christmas literally everybody was doing the quenelle at nightclubs and the like and I gather some…
Mr Bonaparte, is that stepladder really necessary?"
No-one who speaks French could be an evil man… *cough* Petain, Mobutu, Papa Doc, Zinedine Zidane… that's all, right?
Yeah, that's among my favourite indie Belgian movies! The best bit for me is the bit where the main guy has a really intense discourse on the architectural merits and faults of a block of flats before going in and killing one of the inhabitants.
Cool Story, Bro: When the first Kick-Ass movie came out, a sort-of friend of mine told everybody at school that he'd "banged" her at the UK premiere party thing. As he was 16 or 17 at the time, about a year older than me, everyone gave him a wide berth from then on and now he's a Red Bull-addicted, Satanist, dropout…
I didn't know it was even possible to be born posthumously after the mother. I've heard of coffin births, which are the stuff of nightmares, but I'd somehow assumed that the baby was already dead at the time.
Get with it, milord! Those are ministates: tiny countries with basically impeccable legal status (although, for instance, Liechtenstein fails the Montevideo Definition of Statehood on a technicality as Switzerland handles all its international relations) while microstates can be any hypothetical size (e.g. The Moon)…
I don't get the fascination with Noah. He was just a eugenicist who got his doom-mongering predictions right and then got raped by his own son. If you're going to do a Bible adaptation, do a Herod biopic: you know, an actual ambiguous character with source material and everything. You could get rebellion, incest,…
There used to be a "funny" greetings card with a cartoon of two unicorns on the Ark called Gary and Steve or something. So yeah, ho-mo-sexuals are responsible for the extinction of an entire species.
I'm looking forward to this In A Silent Way.
*Stewart, bitch. Fergus is the bland coalition partner guy. Stewart is the guy with the chai and the buzzwords: "Let's imagineer this situation"
I've been a massive fan of Charlie Brooker since about 2006, and I regard this series as the crowning achievement of his post-Huq career (getting married to a children's TV presenter can take some of the edge off one's scathing, vulgar satire, IMHO). Just one small issue with the review, though: Princess Samantha,…
Yeah, White Bear gave me nightmares. *SPOILERS* Just the un-self-conscious hate that everyone was involved in, and the commodification of what happened, and the question of *SERIOUSLY FUCKING SPOILERY* whether she was still deserving of punishment after the memory wipe.
I have a tattoo of it on my back for just that eventuality.
Pah! I'll have you know that the Vinson Massif won me a £20 voucher at a pub quiz in 2010!
Well, not only did the release of the 190-minute epic provide invaluable evidence for those cats who tried to impeach him, but the whole thing lacked both critical integrity and a basic plot. The first two thirds basically consisted of camera-probe footage of a sickeningly thorough rectal examination of the subject by…