< shoots Jose Peterson >

Years ago I had a horrific crush on a coworker. One Monday she came in to work and was telling me about seeing Buckaroo Banzai (on video— it wasn't THAT long ago) with her friends, just rhapsodizing over the watermelon line:

FASEBRIQ!

WHERE'S WALLACE!?

of course, the last character whose story they retooled that much was Arya at Harrenhal, which gave us the Arya/Tywin scenes… ya never know

Don't tell Musashi Miyamoto

If they keep fast-forwarding Theon's plotline like this, they're gonna have to spend another season with him locked in a dungeon for Stannis to catch up!

My issue with it is that Syrio is/was the first sword of Braavos and Jaquen is a faceless assassin who changes identity after every assignment. The latter doesn't seem to allow much time for accomplishing the former.

And since Bronn isn't out of town, he'll be one of the witnesses against Tyrion for ultimate dwarf betrayal?

Genetic Fallacy. Next?

I keep waiting every episode for Balon to die… or any sighting of… erm… Yara… Asha… I CAN'T REMEMBER WHICH NAME IS WHICH ANYMORE!

I would say definitely yes— he has to offer to be his champion after Bronn won't do it… which… wait… how are they going to finagle all of that?

I never watched Nashville, but many Treme fans will tell you that Lucia Micarelli is the most beautiful woman on the planet. M.H. just gets typecast as the jerky guy who gets all the ladies. Him being the noble victim here is actually kind of playing against type…

And there's always the stray Syrio Forel == Jaquen H'gar theorizing… which I've never entirely bought into, but it remains an intriguing thought

I get the sense that a fortnight is actually standard mourning-length in Westeros.

Hodor hodor hodor hodor. Hodor. Hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor. Hodor hodor hodor hodor, hodor hodor hodor hodor— hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor hodor…

I minded the contrived-ness of it less than the "didn't we just have a Jon-Bran near-miss last season at the windmill?"

A devil's advocate is necessary to prevent groupthink. It's a good (if thankless) role for a contrarian motherf***** to take

ooh, good spot!

It was Longclaw, his hand-and-a-half sword (also known as a bastard sword) given him by Lord Mormont after he saved his life by burning the wights. Can be used one- or two-handed. And it looks mighty silly hanging from his hip because, like two-handed swords, they should be worn across the back.