Also, Happy Birthday.

Needful Things by Stephen King. Pretty good so far, about 1/4 of the way through it.

Shortly after college I learned that almost none of my friends had read Slaughterhouse Five and I seriously considered getting all new friends. Instead I offered a dollar to anyone who read it by the end of that particular year. I think only two people collected.

Wait… a guy who wrote a book about Jesus is named "Aslan," as in the Jesus Lion from the Chronicles of Narnia?

Me too, which annoyed me, because one of my favorite parts about the first one was the complete absence of that. Granted, they had like one scene where they were even in the same dimension, but still.

I tried to marathon it (having never watched it before) before Season 5 started and had to stop after the end of Season 2, because (SPOILERS, HO!!!)

Definitely take the day off. I try to take my birthday off every year, though it hasn't worked out the last few years. Last year I specifically forbade people to get me a cake, so a couple of the assistants got me a big cookie instead. If I had the power to do so they'd've all been fired. Technicality-exploiting…

I was going to compare it to sports but I am a total hypocrite and always wear a team shirt or jersey when I go to see a game live.

The wrestling Expendables. An over-the-top old-school action movie starring Hogan (in the Stallone spot) and as many older, retired, no-longer-actively-associated-with-WWE wrestlers-turned-actors as we can get. Piper. Nash. Austin. Dave Batista. Ummm… Tony Lister?

I don't know about cool or not cool (I'm a guy who Internet-named himself after Batman; cool's not my area of expertise), but the primary reason to wear a shirt for a band is to show people that you're a fan of that band. If you're at a show for that band, it's already pretty clear that you're a fan of them. Therefore…

Call your preferred local pizzeria five minutes after it opens, have them deliver a large with every topping you like on it. Repeat daily.

It works for me, at least.

I made sesame chicken in the slow cooker for my lunch this week, because I've been eating healthy all year and really, really, really miss Chinese food. It's not quite the same as takeout, but it's probably a bit healthier, and mixed with brown rice it's been a pretty solid lunch the last two days.

My ex-girlfriend introduced me to Airborne a few years ago and I swear by that stuff now. It is like rocket fuel. They should put it in the water like fluoride.

In the article, or in seasons two through five?

How do you know that's not what's already happening?

If they'd just made a John Leather movie instead, all this trouble could have been avoided.

But, in their defense, Iron Man 3 was awesome.

I think the mental gymnastics are on the part of the reviewer, who really stuck the landing on the "deliberately missing the point" exercise.

Also an episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm, but I don't remember which one, and a fairly recent Venture Bros.