Clearly, U R the expert on that.

"Tell your old man to drag Tommy Thompson and George Pataki up and down the court for 48 minutes…"

"Honey, I just noticed something:
I'm quite fit and attractive.
You, on the other hand, look like Chris Christie's stunt double…"

CSI: Paul Blart

Well, that's just pathetic.

Nothing brightens up a comedy like a woman's death!

Can't be Shatner — just like at that first photo: those short, chubby lil' fingers can't even hold a phone!

There's a special sarcasm font.

"I was thinking maybe I could just marry into posture…"

Only saw "Fire Maidens of Outer Space" once, many moons ago…

Honestly, I think the best hope for them moving on from repealing the ACA might be the fact that so many of their donors/key groups (BCBS, AARP, AMA, etc.) hate their plan so much.

Joe Flacco?

"Chow-DARE !!!"

"Welcome to Fantasy Island…!
I'm your host, Mr. Rourke… and that freakishly small person humping your leg is my former assistant, Tattoo."

Neigh!

Did he send out the notices by horse carriage?

Bing!

An Ed Lynch mob?

I appreciate you saying that.

Good for you!
Here, have a baseball… I'm sure the other team won't mind.