Slow clap.

I wouldn't be surprised if the orange fuck okayed frakking on the San Andreas fault.

My mother in law doesn't eat any vegetables, has never had a salad, and has never tried any kind of soup or fish. I still can't get over someone never having tried soup.

"Monkey" by The Supersuckers

"Fish in the Jailhouse" by Tom Waits

Raising Arizona

Who's the coolest dude or dudette you've ever met?
Mine would be my grandpa. After telling the story of The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald like he was actually there and pouring a gin and tonic and turning on Wes Montgomery, told me that if nothing else I could always serve as a bad example.

Can you tell us a story about working with a real asshole, no names necessary?

So, whores then?

Lana

The Big Lebowski, chilling with The Dude. Or Pee Wee's Playhouse.

You shot who in the what now?

Did 2016 significantly change your view of or faith in humanity?

Ha ha. She slapped you so hard you died.

Close enough.

That was RED.

Sledge Hammer!

Midnight Special

Yes, except for selling all the gold to the morons.

Goddamn, orange fuck, son of a bitch, asshole! [uses swearing tickets to wipe ass]