Not feeling Trevor Noah?

My ex-girlfriend had raccoon eyes…

Whining?

On 9/11, I was supposed to see Apples In Stereo at the Highdive in Champaign, IL. It was cancelled, but man, would I have loved some Apples In Stereo on one of the worst days in American history.

I know, I know, her personality/service to the devil should make her unappealing, but I can't help it.

I'm genuinely attracted to Meghan Kelly, who has great skin, so I can't include her here. But I can objectify her based on her looks!

Some might say tit-for-tat (tete-a-tete?), but I'm a pretty firm believer in the concept that two wrongs don't make a right, so I feel pretty shitty about resorting to that level of discourse.

"Upon my chain, you surely do yank!"

Steaming sexism incoming. Please accept my apology in advance.

I'm upvoting this comment because 1. I like you, and 2. I think it's a computer programming reference. Isn't "simple" a programming term? No? Oh.

"Black History Month" is probably my favorite episode of American Dad.

Hear, hear, and interestingly (or not), I just said to my wife that Patriot seems like a show directed by Wes Anderson and based on a Coen brothers sketch. I fully second the idea of Terry O'Quinn being in the next season of Fargo. Or the fourth, fifth and sixth seasons of Fargo (fingers crossed!).

Same with Cheney.

Keep fighting the good fight, friend. One day at a time.

Okay, I celebrate Spoon's entire catalog. I only said the thing above to get attention. I'm such a weak person. ALL HAIL SPOON!

I have such a raging pang of protectiveness right now.

Okay, fine, there were a few good songs on Girls Can Tell.

I know!

You should see the other guy.

Interestingly, as that guy's ex was leaving for the last time, he sang "Why Go" to her.