That's pretty lame. Honestly, I think seeing a good comedy in a full theater can make jokes work better, with some infectious laughter to help me get into it.

When he was three years old, my brother's favorite song was "Working on the Highway". Thirty years later, he's a traffic engineer. Coincidence? I think not!

I made this zucchini, tomato, and rice gratin last night. Nice flavors, though the ratio of stuff may have been off for my tastes. More rice might have been an improvement. I paired this with some corona beans, tossed with diced peppers, oregano, and white wine vinegar.

Elvis Costello & the Attractions - "Living In Paradise"
The New Pornographers - "Champions of Red Wine"
Ted Leo and the Pharmacists - "Under the Hedge"
Bad Religion - "Don't Pray On Me"
DEVO - "Planet Earth"

Trump thinks Citizen Kane would have won the election, if only he had had a bigger picture of himself at his campaign speech.

Shovel on more dogs

I begin all my public speaking appearances with an optimistic 'People how you doin'? There's a new day dawning."

But the Friend Zone is full of friends! A whole zone of them! How fun! Who would want to be friends with an asshole? Are you sure you're not thinking of hot dog casings?

It's a stretch, but giving somebody radioactive jewelry made me think of TNG's "Thine Own Self".

Someone even came up with a complicated plan, and then explained it with a simple analogy.

Incredibly Chekhov- isn't it a reference to his conversation with Scotty in "The Trouble with Tribbles", claiming scotch was inwented by a little old lady from Leningrad?

I finally caught this last night, with my folks. My mother thought it was a good analogue to the political conventions, with the Federation's message of 'unity will make us strong' mirroring the Democrats, and Krall / Trump insisting we're weak and need wars to assert our dominance.

I'm here to tell you there's something else- the afterworld.

Those fucking New Jersey moochers?

Maybe Sam Jackson will show up with a reading from Ezekiel?

It's not even like it's the halfway point, there's just a final blessing and announcements of when the next pancake dinner or whatever is after that- you're only saving five minutes but wind up looking like a complete jerk. You're too good to stick around and let Deacon Bill tell you to go in peace and joy to love and…

Well of course, everything looks bad if you remember it.

I'm not saying it's true. I just hear these things, you know. People are talking, and I irresponsibly repeat whatever I hear without checking. Or sometimes I make it up and attribute it to vaguely defined "people" to avoid accountability.

And Donald Trump thinks he's running for the role of Harrison Ford in Air Force One. Maybe I'll grant he could punch Gary Oldman better than Hillary, but that's about all I'll give him.

Yes, but he was only there to portray Lyndon Johnson.