Did I miss something? I just woke up from a long night of coke, Scotch, Viagra and hookers… 

"And Captain Matthews tries to get everyone loaded, because… I have no idea why. What is his purpose?"

Yes, fuck that incompetent Cuban asshole, indeed.

Who? Oh, you mean NOT Quinn? She is probably busy not solving all the other cases Batista's clownshoes are not solving.

"Oh, yeah, we totally give a shit about what the AV Club thinks about our show," said no Dexter writer, ever (sadly).

The Cuban-led army of inept, window-lickin' oxygen thieves at Miami PD haven't figured out that Morgan is a serial killer in 8 FUCKING YEARS. Seriously, what the fuck makes anyone think that he's gonna get caught in the next 3 episodes???

Sure thing, buddy, but last time I checked, there was no bench with your name on it.

Four more fucking episodes of this bullshit. Then I can go back to my boat, sit on my ass, and scratch my balls while I get hammered. No more dealing with Batista's army of irredeemable, incompetent fucknuggets. No more Morgan 3rd rate soap opera circlejerking. God, I can't fucking wait for this shit to be over…

I killed Harry.

I've been saving my piss all day so I can stop by and say "hola" on my way home tonight.

Well, If you had listened to me, you wouldn't be a fucking bench now. But no, you had to go all Sherloca Homies on Dexter's ass.

So you "like" me, huh? Trust me, buddy, I would fuck you with Lt. Batista's dick.

"Captain Matthews is the only character more corrupt than Quinn."

Goddammit. I still can't fucking believe I came out of retirement for this bullshit!