"That Jody is legally her husband, is a factor that needs to be considered before a rape charge is brought" - attitudes like this are why many states legally didn't believe spouses could be raped until the last few decades. No consent, no ability to consent=rape.

"that the actions were taken out of love for the person in question furhter muddies the rape question" - No, it doesn't. The absence of consent - even from a wife, even from a loved one - equals rape. Full stop. The arguably beneficial intent of the act in no way makes it not rape.