I feel like a grizzled PhilPhil take on Oasis might have actually been at least vaguely interesting.

I like how PhilPhils didn't realize that Jimmy's bit about "standing still" was a metaphor and not a stage direction.

It is really time for DeAndre to go. Dentists could save huge amounts of money on nitrous if they'd just pipe his competent but uninteresting falsetto into their offices. It was the first performance of the night and I nearly fell asleep three times in his two minute song.

It wasn't great, but I think that much the fault lies with whomever arranged or mixed it. Both were ridiculously bad.

What are the rules of succession in Westeros? I assume this means that a bastard son would have a claim on the throne?

I hate that we're not going to find out where the show was going, but don't regret having invested in this richly rewarding first season. I can't really fathom how people found it bad or boring. Confusing, maybe. But even that first episode had some glorious moments and energy.

I agree that Erika deserved to be saved, but she already got one reprieve from America's idiocy when the judges brought her into the top thirteen. They did their best and I have a feeling that one more more save would've just bought DeAndre or Heejun another week.

Was really hoping that this week's makeover would at least de-mullet Coltron.

He's not my favorite, but I see your point. His goofball cartoon performance is at least a little more interesting that the increasingly dull crooner routine that he had been doing; so more power to him. Though I'm guessing his time in the Idoldome is limited, the songs might as well match his attitude while he's…

This is at least the second time Ryan's played the awkward fake-out on Colton. They have a very special bond, those two.

that was my take on the whip, too. I mean, aside from all of the mystical growly training business.

I was horrified when I looked at the DialIdol predictions (they had Eben and Brielle at the top) this morning; so tonight's results were a tremendous relief. I would've been completely fine without the wild cards.

I think that a couple of the girls this year might better than most of the guys, but last night hardly make me feel like the guys were worse as a group. Maybe it's a case of higher highs versus lower lows.

the degree to which the judging trio want to be adored is embarrassing. they're more cheerleaders than judges at this point.

Every time I watch him, I'm also perplexed by what's happening with HeeJun's glasses. I'm leaning toward them being  just empty frames. And there's your inadvertent metaphor tonight, ladies and gentlemen.

Last night's episode made me realize that I need some sort of horse ownership / age / prospects flow chart. At the very least, they could've cast horses that look so similar.

I, too, had given the show more credit and was a little bit surprised (and disappointed) by the corpse revelation.

To be fair, though, the beard NEEDED to be tamed.

Jacob makes me wish that we could call to vote songtestants off. TOO MUCH.

deduct a half letter grade for each feather or tail wardrobe choice as well as any lipstick malfunctions.