@I Like Meat: no, I totally am going to give you the "time and place" argument. We might be snarky, but not many of us are not happy to applaud an outrageous remark when it makes light of people's death. As was so rightly pointed out about 2 inches up, it's a king dick move.

So if it were to end, that would be tolerable then?

@Malfunctioning Eddie: I think you may be posting on it.

Oh. You're still here.

This Inventory
is so washed.

OK, now I'm reading it and I'm still confused as fuck. Are they trying to see David Mamet and raise him?

No comments on Magnolia then.
OK, I'll start, outrageous lateness notwithstanding. About 7 years ago a friend's brother committed suicide at the age of 21 with a bunch of sleeping pills and a slug of vodka. I spent the day with her, and after she left to go back to her parents' I was sat at home alone when Magnolia…

Oh shit, that movie. After I was finally coerced into watching it, I made a rule never to watch a film on the recommendation of anyone who said that it "would appeal to [my] sense of humour."

Man I SO did not get that movie. My gf and I had to rewind every scene about three times to work out WTF they were chatting about. It totally ruined the flow. I feel like I missed out on something, but I figure you can either make up your own language OR mumble like you're eating a cracker while talking, but not both.

Midway Entertainment vs The Shark

So what we're saying is that while one singer may be dead, there are thousands that aren't, so they win the argument?

"How anyone could say she hadn't already faded under the massive shadow of Gaga is beyond me"

Three em dashes in 800 words ain't so bad. Hell, Steve uses the em dash less often than Rabin uses the word "I".

That joke gets even funnier when he beats Buzzsaw in the Rifftrax version.

that Doherty weasel
Great obit, with one exception.

Upgrading your hologram projector is not "knocking up", Krieger.

I really like your mom too.

OK so Vi Hart already kinda did this joke…
… but this is definitely pi-winning.

And where's Towelie? Some gimmicks just aren't keeping to the programme.

@Sajanas: to keep them, yes. To be able to open them again… probably not. Like someone said further up, it takes all of 30 years for a digital dark age to set in. Remember when NASA had to go trawling eBay for old equipment because they'd carefully kept all their old floppy disks but couldn't read them anymore?