Don't worry little big bada boom.

They should get sent to the courthouse where that guy who says he's Sherlock Holmes is having his insanity hearing.

I've been to that museum! I got a Sherlock Holmes tie* and a pen that looks like a syringe.

This may be the stupidest joke I ever actually laughed at.

I read the first sentence as "The Taco Bell I went to was made out of beef", which would have been a much more interesting story.

That guy's a little too blonde. I think he's a Targaryen.
The cashier obviously thinks he's dreamy.

I think of it as being a funny, raunchy Doctor Who, except the Doctor is an abusive, profane alcoholic and his companion is his friendless, horny, adolescent grandson.

The guy didn't speak English! He deserved it.

It's like Football in the Groin, only directed by David Lynch!

I suck!

I used to have a Bitch School t-shirt from the Break Like the Wind tour.

It's the one where Kevin Bacon throws a bucket of water on a baby in the corner.

If you don't like it, you can take a powder.

And satyrs for the ladies!

I would eat that Meryl Streep cannoli.

For a $1,000 donation she will show you Brest.
For $2,000 you get to see both of them.

I don't know what's sadder, that you know that or that I'm impressed that you know that.

It's equivalent to 12 parsecs worth of salary!

And only three of them were scientists!

Yeah, I can't believe that silly bitch addressed the UN about how feminism is a good thing, and positive for men as well. I mean, shaddup, go get a boob job and make me a sandwich, amirite?