Studios want a recognizable property to get butts in the seats and directors are artists who want to leave their personal stamp on something rather than churn out material like an assembly line worker. As least that's how I see it.

Ballistic: I Am Legend vs. Legion

Yeah Jesus my wife was in tears even on the drive home.

*Puts away a dog-earred copy of SOUNDS LIKE A DENIAL BUT REALLY ISN'T 2011 EDITION*

Time Portal reboot: "What's this Kodo and Podo? An EYE-fun?" *bleep bloop tweet*

Because I was only 15 minutes into the movie *bowtie spins*

"God dammit you can't pick Odd Job thems rules."

When Mario is explaining to an angry convience store clerk that his last name was also Mario hence the name Mario Brothers which somehow came up because he was upset at the cost of bottled water, I don't mind telling you I wept.

The classy no-aim car was the white one with the heat seeking ghost missles.

Yes, yes, we've all read the screenplay.

I still have a copy of the complete Sherlock Holmes around where I underlined every usage of the classical form of "ejaculated" and I did this as a grown ass man.

The only Speckled Band I saw…

Have I solved this case…?

My cat's only crime was… curiosity. *puts on SWAT helmet and puts Mr. Skitters in the bedroom while I sweep up a shattered flower pot*

This reminds me that there have been more films about Sherlock Holmes than any other character.

I think I heard of your cousin, didn't he have an uncle that worked for Nintendo and hid boobs in all of the games?

Okay I like your better.

Jolie: "No honey, you can't use it sidways."
Thorton: "Daggnabbit woman it's mah burfday! Shoot! Consarnit!"

Wow this reddit website sounds really important!

They call me "Bachelor Baccarat" and my crumpled up checks from Mom are always accepted at the Alkalai Gulch Japanese Internment Camp Memorial and Casino.