That's when she takes the muscle relaxants.

The "Canadian Newt Gingrich" sounds like history's greatest monster to me.

I'm from Can-a-da and they think I'm slow. Ehhhhh?

Don't forget Ku Klux Klam!

I love Santiago—the hometown of Pablo Neruda!

This is my son, Bart. He owns a factory downtown!

When, when? Ich bin hungrig!

No one who speaks German could be an evil man!

The weariness on his face when he said "Ja, Ja" was priceless.

I think you meant "a 9-hour collect call from the States"

Intercourse, PA is a real town and has a lot of Amish people.

I'm surprised you were able to write so legibly on your own butt.

When Bea Arthur died, one of my favorite celebrity gossip sites said she "went to the big lanai in the sky". I was sad she died, but laughed for about 5 minutes.

A missionary? But I don't believe in Jeebus!

Can I borrow a feeling? Can you lend me a jar of love? Hurtin' hearts need some healing, take my hand with your glove of love!

Call it an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are no good at everything.

I loved Darryl's single tear.

There's nothing wrong with Eastern Europe — they gave us "Worker and Parasite"!

Close the door, you're letting the heat out!

Meow meow meow meow
Meow meow meow meow…