I was hoping Garrett Morris would announce Kim & Kanye as "Lord and Lady Douchebag."

Sam Elliott, you put your mustache back on, you're freaking everybody out.

Yes, the recipe is included in the excellent book "How to Archer" by Sterling Archer. Might be my favorite Amazon purchase ever.

They still have the ice cream shop, which is the new clubhouse and a sound financial investment. What kid wouldn't want a cherry chocolate chip waffle cone served by a dirty, homicidal biker named Rat or a chronic masturbater with creepy prosthetic fingers?

Jax is "outlaw" enough to gun people down in broad daylight but not outlaw enough to cross the California DMV.

All I could picture in my mind was the chase sequence in the Simpsons when Sideshow Bob was trying to escape in the Wright Brothers flyer. "If the tennis rackets don't get you, the pool skimmers will!"

How does it feel to be an Independent, Teller?

Ignore the haters, this really wasn't that bad. Not sure why people are decrying a film entitled "Dumb and Dumber" for being politically incorrect and filled with gross-out humor. I definitely got my $9 ticket price worth of laughs. More lowbrow and less quotable than the original, but still worth seeing.

When Jax said to Juice, "I'll be sure it's quick," my reaction was- "Too late!"

"Jax is a good guy" is equivalent to "Jay Cutler is a good quarterback." Neither phrase when uttered ever sounds convincing.

Abel is played by twins. Sutter had fork-stabbed the other one.

"I’d rather South Park get to the business of making me laugh rather than teaching me about the ins-and-outs of mobile-gaming’s nefarious moneymaking strategy."