My friends, Broadchurch has recently returned to the airwaves and it is glorious. While I was and am apprehensive about where the show will go after the first series, the premiere episode for two was pretty damn strong. Nothing against Anna Gunn, but the chemistry between David Tennant and Olivia Colman isn't…

You know, Ben Wyatt may have cause to like women on roller-skates….anywho…this movie is probably going to be a disaster if the corny trailer is anything to go on.

Remember the Clone Wars episode that had a big hullabaloo about padawans making their own lightsabers? This show has Ezra making his without any formal training AND have it be incredibly toyetic with an alternate blaster mode. Sure, you could argue about the practicality of a combination lightsaber/blaster in the Star…

Remember when someone decided it was a good idea to give The Onion a TV show? Radar's won't fair any better.

My Girl Scout Cookie Rankings:

My hatred for Josh Gad's acting career is similar to Michael Scott's hatred for Toby Flenderson.

Cookie Crisp haven't been the same since the crook and cop mascots. Although I guess an argument can be made for the dog mascot era.

Can I just say Samoas > Caramel deLites. You think they're the same cookie but they are not! THEY'RE NOT DAMN IT! THEY'RE DIFFERENT! Different bakeries! Different cookies! Same goes for Tagalongs and Peanut Butter Patties. And don't get me started on those Coconut Dreams sold by Keebler!

Why does Ross, the largest friend, not simply eat the other five?

Sleepy Hollow is back? Eeeeeeehhhhh. I went from being excited to the show to whelmed to underwhelemed to oh my fucking god why doesn't this show just end already.

So you're telling me Galavant ISN'T a Luck of the Irish prequel? Well, gosh.

Now why would you folks subject people to such horrors?

Crime? Boy, I don't know.

Nah, he just wants to talk about the wonderful services offered by MailChimp.

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHMMMMMMMMVOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORP VOOOOOOOOOOOOOORP VOOOOOOOOOOOOOORP. WUUUUUSSSSSHH SSSSSSH HSSSSSHH ZIP ZIP ZIP ZIP.

Well, it ends with a scene that takes place on Christmas so I'm counting it!

Around this time I begin my annual Kind of Christmas Movie Marathon. On this year's docket are: Die Hard, Lethal Weapon, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Iron Man 3, Jingle All the Way, Christmas Vacation and The Night of the Hunter.

I have to drive 22 minutes to get to the nearest theater that's showing Inherent Vice in my county as opposed to the 13ish minutes it takes me to get to the usual theater I go to that typically gets limited release stuff. Now, you might think, "Gee Palmer45, that extra nineish minutes you have to take sure is…

Coming in 2015: Asses of the A.V. Club. Literally, just pictures (tasteful, mind you) of A.V. Club staffers' asses. With a forward and afterward written by John Teti's ass.

This Holiday Undercover just went up to 11.