Too bad.

It's all side ass!  That's the least desirable ass.  Even side-boob is significantly higher on the flesh value chart.  I feel lied to by this video.

At some point one of the candy dudes (the Duke probably?) is snooty to him so he breaks into the Duke's castle, punches him, and robs him.  He is later called awesome by a judge and gets to kiss a hot girl.

Is he?  I thought he was mostly known as a lazy shouting hack that made Jack and Jill so he and his friends could collect an easy paycheck and a bunch of product placement bonuses.

He's too lazy of a filmmaker to rape your childhood.  He'll likely just catcall at your childhood from a nearby construction yard.

Don't forget that he also always has to show up a snooty guy with old fashioned common sense at some point.  He may even have to punch them, or in the case of Big Daddy, break into their house and assault/rob them!  It's okay though, because it's for a kid.

Man if you transcribed all the exposition in that thing it would be longer than most Philip K. Dick short stories, and it would still be full of irritating holes.  I've always wanted to see an alternate version where the architect creates the final layer of the dream (in the movie it's the snow chalet with the super…

I'm overall pretty happy with pop culture, since I can fairly easily ignore the vast majority of it and just focus on the stuff I already think is done right.  So I'd use my wish to troll people.  Here we go:

Nuts to that.  He'd sit on it for 7 years and then announce sadly that he has to abandon it to make Doctor Strange.  Gotta include a caveat that del Toro actually makes his damn films instead of just acquiring rights like halloween candy.

Begins had basically no good fight scenes because of quick cuts and gritty close ups.  I remember the little discussion in the prison when Ducard was saying "You just fought 6 men" and Wayne says "I counted 7."  I was thinking "Really?  I counted about 35 different forearms, 16 or so knees, a lot of rolling clothing,…

Generally speaking there are two reasons.  People either think he's inferior because he's the second guy (which is pretty damn stupid), or because he's recently started to get all right-wingy.

SoMI and SoMI2 are both iphone apps with the original and revamped graphics, as well.  Pretty available, really.

It's regular porn, made by nazi children.

I rock the shit out of Freedom 90.  Then follow that up with Africa. Generally throw in some J. Geils if the night is still young.

I would plow through a crowd to throw a quarter down against someone spotted playing an MvC with a big mashy hand on the buttons.  That game series had some finesse.  Sure a lot of it was measuring button sequences and timing that was about as complex as dialing a phone, but still.

Yeah, but the human characters are still live-action, so it's DQ'd.

Pedro looks like Gomez Addams.  Like the original comic drawings of Gomez Addams.

Cape Feare dammit!  Cape Feare!

Crazy old lady ranting at my store this morning:  "When's the game with Tebow?  You know who he is?  He's the quarterback, and he gets on his knees and points his fingers to the sky and thank heaven for touchdowns!  He's a good christian!"

Beer - Reel Big Fish