Can't do it. I tried. "Hello Megan" becoming a thing ended that series right quick for me.

It would have been a better film if it hadn't been so … arty at the start. The shot of the kid yelling and smacking two stuffed animals together, complete with various slow-mo tricks and so on, just went on waaaay too long.

Oh nice, a young Catherine O'Hara. Someone let Christopher Guest know, I'm sure he's assembling a bunch of charming small-town caricatures already.

Oh please, you are entirely too gay. You fart glitter.

He's not Dr. Impossible, he's Professor Impossible. And he's not that anymore either, he's like "Professor Indochina" or some such.

Third Wave Ska
I've never seen a trend det dropped so violently, but for a short time in the late 90s everyone was doing that shitty skank dance to Reel Big Fish, Save Ferris, the Aquabats, the Hippos, and so on. Even the bands that started in that vein and survived all ditched those rad horn sections.

I crave the sweet pain of trying to explain The Traveling Wilburys to people. Especially trying to explain the value of Jeff Lynne.

Also bonus, it's the same song as "Jerry Was a Race Car Driver", so if that one comes on you can just sing Big Brown Beaver instead. Or better, sort of side-mouthedly mumble under the guitar.

That was the brownest film. Everything in it was various browns. Like a poo movie.

Ugh, most stoner movies are like that. They're so bad about hitting the lowest-common-denominator notes.

Nerds in the school sandbox
When I first saw this, I was under the impression that the other two alien'd out crewmen were played by the old LA radio morning crew Mark and Brian. Truth?

And the installation of cameras in the sorority house? That kind of spying should have had the whole house disbarred and the students involved arrested. It may be an amusing film, but it isn't harmless to suggest that it's okay to illicitly spy on naked girls as long as they're mean bitches who already said no to…

Duke Percival Wensleydale Lobsterbib Fattington Bottoms, formerly of Manchester-upon-a-bog and current Earl of Penistone.

Nah, that's my fault. I haven't read chapterhouse in a long time, and I always forget that while it's bizarre that the only thing to not get renamed in 40,000 years of history is jews, he doesn't exactly hate on them.

Great series to read if you want a slow-motion view of an author just going goddamn crazy.

What's wrong, you don't want a lengthy and tooth-grindingly boring dissertation on some angry Portuguese lady and her neverending tide of one-dimensional children?

PRASMA BRADE!

Mortal Kombat
Specifically the games. Something about the existence of suuuuuuuper-secret fatalities just tore at my teen brain. Now I try to play them and the "signature" control style has become a "clunky" control style, and that semi mocap art…

How is NIMH good? It has like no story arc, a bunch of characters that don't do anything, and the worst comic relief ever. Plus it's sort of the harbinger of Don Bluth animation shit that would come. That stuff was always so floaty and oversaturated looking. Simple conversations between the two dogs in All Dogs…

The term January Graveyard
It's making me sad about The Green Hornet. I never had high expectations, but a January release makes them way lower.