i take it back, juggalos are nature's stormtroopers.

the first one.

so apparently…
…juggalos are nature's fremen.

another student loan casualty.

CTRL/F.

how do i know hipsters aren't breeding? i'm an abortion doctor.

Baby Hatin' Hipsters
is the pure unadulterated hatred that hipsters have for babies and people with babies grounded in a larger misanthropy? Or is it because babies don't understand hipsters' giant glasses and simpsons references? either way i'm glad hipsters aren't breeding.

If you obey society's rules
You will be society's fools
You'll obey and then disobey
You'll disobey but then you'll obey
You thought your mom and dad were fools
You never wanted to listen in school
Now your mind won't go where you want to take it
You got a ride but you're not gonna make it

RAPIST COMING THROUGH. TRY NOT TO GET RAPED.

Sci Fi (which is, criminally, not part of basic cable here in Chicago)
Comedy Central
Food Network
Travel Channel
Cartoon Network

FLASH! AHHHHH AAHHHHHH! HE'S A MIRACLE!

still haven't seen a movie in 3D
and I doubt I'll break my streak for this nonsense.

given the history of Spinal Tap drummers…
…do you have any fears for your life?

its a good thing i scrolled down, because i was totally about to post this terrible joke.

…um. shucks.

come on now
Blue Harvest and Something, Something, Something, Dark Side were both mildly humorous. Let's give him a chance.

come on now
Blue Harvest and Something, Something, Something, Dark Side were both mildly humorous. Let's give him a chance.

Chord Progression from Hell
in a brief google search, I was unable to confirm, though I still maintain, that at some point in the Catholic Church's history, the chord progression used at the beginning of Richard III was declared to be "satanic" or something to that effect.

David Cross is a dog-fucker
You've just been Crossed my man.

For a fleeting moment I thought Sally Sparrow from "Blink" was going to be a companion, and that would have been fine by me.