We're all going to die.

Blabs a bunch of bullshit about "military options."

I hate this shit.

“Devour immediately.” This is the final instruction on many of Stella Parks’ elegantly quirky recipes, and it encapsulates the spirit that her new release

Uh… have you been using toxic industrial waste as lubricant again?

Because it's cold outside at night.

Well, a scented Tiki torch from Home Depot. That really drives the message home.

How did you know about the weiner hammering stuff? Those videos haven't been leaked to the media yet!

How dare you? Jessica Walters is a saint!

maybe more masturbation, or maybe i'll go back to the gym.

I assume that they got straight and went forward. The problems mostly came along when they broke their sun-baby-momma's back.

he might also be a virulent, awful racist; the opening part of the post notes that his “heritage is strong and pure,”

Your lifestyle change? Are you retiring as DM and becoming a player? Or are you buying that new set of curtains you've been wanting?

A group of asshats is actually called a "brunch."

It can be two things.

[penis grows]

That's what Alien Mary said!

I drive an older car, and one of the best things about it is that is still has the "modular" installation bays for stereo systems. In new cars, the stereo is heavily integrated into the dashboard, and basically impossible to upgrade.

You can get an FM transmitter that also charges your device for like $5 on eBay.

How so?