Just play the games on a damn emulator - it'll probably be a much better experience.

Tiger blood's a hell of a life extender.

Why the hell would you reward Nintendo for pulling this crap?

The Elevator That Couldn't Slow Down

I'm sure the supporting cast are as strong as the steel beams that support large buildings.

Like… Katya becomes a robot…

Hilarious!

Not as much as pants.

Ain't that the +2th!

Depends on what's in stock.

No, he's Scotch.

That's not a podium, that's a lectern.

Usually Sean O'Neal writes the articles. Has he decided to take up photography instead?

That's incorrect.

Also, did you catch the subtle implication that this other woman is a prostitute?

Not even then.

Alrighty, then.

C'mon, "Lana is a transgender man" isn't funny?

Spoiler: It's actually a peninsula.

Now is time on Sprockets when we masturbate.