Don't dress up your pets, people. They are animals, and if you put clothes on them they will hate you. Especially cats, which hate you already.

I always set the emergency brake when I park my car, but apparently nobody else does. So whenever someone else drives my car, they try to drive it with the brake on.

A vote twenty years from now is still another vote.

If they vote leave, we'll have to call hot dogs "sandwiches."

But there will be future votes. Do you think the pro-Leave camp makes a good argument, or would you rather Scotland stay in the UK?

Just out of curiosity, what do you think about the Scottish independence movement?

So, more like the US under The Articles of Confederation.

I heard that episode, but I think that test ignores things like Italian sausage sandwiches, which are usually only about an inch longer than your standard dog, and also footlong hotdogs, which you can obviously cut in half and still not look like a moron.

If you want a great breakfast sandwich, have I got the thing for you. Start with a Reuben, then on top add bacon, two fried eggs, and a slice of rye toast. It will kill you, but it's a hell of a way to go.

I was about to agree, but if we call gyros sandwiches, I think we also have to call tacos sandwiches.

I'm originally from about an hour and a half north of Philly, but moved down to SE Virginia for grad school. There's a "Philly cheesesteak" place here that serves a decent sandwich, but they always want to put mayo on it. This made me less upset than everyone's indifferent reactions when I told them it about this…

How do you eat it? Do you not bother to prevent flopping, or is your 'za just stiff as a board?

What? The two halves of a sub roll usually remain joined at one side. If you had a meatball sub in which the roll was cut all the way through, you'd lose your balls.

No one has been able to provide me with a sufficient reason why a hot dog is not a sandwich. The only difference between it and other sausage sandwiches is the type of sausage.

Funny fat people are definitely still a thing.

Relatively young person here (born in '93). Girard is making lots of sense. I don't remember any of the Barney jokes. The artist should stick to stuff that she actually remembers, not just has a vague recollection of.

I think he is sculpting Barney out of some sort of viscous tar-like substance.

NO SUSHI FOR YOU!

:(

Can't we just all be cool for once? Why does everything have to be a big thing?