So, you've got a really hot girlfriend but nothing better to do on a Saturday afternoon than post here? Your post is bullshit. You're bullshit. You're another jerk-off first year fiction student playing pretend on the 'net to sharpen your skills as a writer. I, on the other hand, have nothing to do on a Saturday night…

There seems to be a surplus of this "too-many-personal-details/deliberately-unpc" gag posting lately. It isn't funny or even interesting, so why not do everybody a favor and stop? At the very least, do it all under one username so some of us can just ignore you.

WHERE'S THAT THING, THAT FIERY FLYING SOMETHING OR OTHER? WHERE IS IT? TELL ME!!!!

Children of Men is a great movie and anybody who doesn't like it is an asshole.

Still daringly intrepid, Jack Ryan told OP to go fuck himself.

Here's an idea: die in your sleep!

C'mon, Oates. Even for you this is really stupid.

The big question is will there be busty Hobbit gals in it? I like the ladies.

Which one, fellas?
Which of the fine-looking cast members from The Descent would you do? My own choice would be Saskia Mulder as Becca. Nice rack on that gal.

Does NBA stand for "now-blubbery ass"?

What a pair of tits…

Back and to the left…

KB, there's a big difference between BEING an enormous penis and HAVING an enormous penis. Just ask my wife, who devoutly wishes that the latter instead of the former were true of me.

I don't read anything. I just think about tits and then type something up and hit "post". Except when I log off to post. Then I actually do think about what I'm writing, though you wouldn't know it, since most of what I post when I'm logged off is also drivel. I'm kind of a vacuous numbskull, actually.

"I'm probably just being superficial"

What do you mean by "diversity"? I don't want any Goddamned gays or brown-skinned people living next door to me. Who wants to do this Kemper broad? I sure do. I loves me some wimmens.

I'm not pretentious, Goddammit. I'm just a smug, simple-minded ass who makes snap judgments and blurts them out like they were the gospel truth. Which is what they are, far as I'm concerned. So, fuck you, you unregistered piece of shit. And this Kemper broad has a smokin' rack. I'd do 'er anytime.

Laura Prepon's big problem is that she become considerably less attractive as soon (almost) as she left her teens. Too bad, 'cause she was some sexy piece of ass 'til then. Kinda dykey though. Probably just needed a man to straighten her out.

Hey, we all know the chicas don't have a long shelf life, but J-Lo is still more than do-able. I mean, c'mon! If we're all getting boners over Meryl Streep and Helen Mirren, we can't possibly be giving a second thought to whether Lopez is worth a squirt.

I like to fuck. And Joni Mitchell is totally do-able.