My uncle is Batman

My mom's from Ireland and my dad's from Israel, so I don't know whether to eat matzah balls or stick them up my ass!

If your family has been here for 150 years I think it's probably safe to say you're an American now.

Hey, is it just me, or is "Zombie" one of the most face-slappingly stupid critiques of a complex and difficult situation ever recorded? I suppose it's not as bad as "Salvation" - "To all the kids with heroin eyes, don't do it, don't do it."

Did he really say "oftentimes"? Really?

That's what the Czechs consider the vegetarian option.

You can still get it in the UK. Covered in caramel and chunks of chocolate, of course. Man those things are amazing.

From Hell really isn't that bad - I'm guessing all the hate is from people who've read the book. Expectations were set too high. The 70s Lord Of The Rings isn't that bad either - weird, yes, unsettling, yes, but not bad.

Yeah, I remember that. What a very strange programme that was, they should bring it back.

A shot? Surely a honk on a crack pipe would be more appropriate.

The accents aren't that strong, and there are subtitles. Basically I'm saying you're an idiot.

This, pretty much - http://haonowshaokao.wordpr…

I think Simon Cowell will win.

I quite like Skrillex. I'm 33. I'm not pretending to like it to impress high school kids, to be cool or to be contrary, in case anyone was about to accuse me of any of those things.

Even if you're not a fan of Doctor Who there's a huge amount of other things which were lost - Not Only But Also, Hancock's Half Hour, many important TV plays, most of the TV performances by all the famous bands of the era, there's a show called "United!" that ran for 147 episodes, of which exactly 0 survive, there's…

A Winged Victory For The Sullen, I Break Horses and Com Truise are among my favourite acts of the year. Did anyone actually listen to the CDs or did they just guffaw and update the "hilarious names" speadsheet?

Because getting a million dollar salary doesn't mean you've done anything worthy of getting that chunk of society's resources. He could just as easily pretend he's getting an untaxed half-million-dollar salary, which is still a hell of a lot. Why is he entitled to more?

Whenever I see a security camera I duck round a corner, then take it out with my rifle. It's the only way to be sure.

Hey everyone, I'm just curious, which of these famous names disappoints you the most with its presence on this list? - http://atlasshrugged.com/th…

The version on the "No Education = No Future (Fuck The Curfew)" EP is at least 60% better.