Can you still tell someone's accent when their mouth is full?

(sniff)
Hey, you smell like the gunpowdery smoke rising from nine fresh bulletwounds! Are you wearing Power?

(ahem)
Cocksuckers.

Having seen her in her heyday, I'm going to declare that it was impossible to fuck Sally Field too much.

For greatest indignity, he will do all of the above while dressed as a raccoon.

Depending on your mood, the first Mortal Kombat movie is only mildly repellent.

He's gonna appeal that to the dean's office, given it wasn't a true double post.

My Minesweeper script got put in turnaround by Paramount, otherwise you'd all be reminiscing on

Mbs, that's when Catherine agrees to help Jimmy James beat the three-card monte scam, and has to do some fancy cardshuffle to show Beth she knows the ropes.

I'm representing San Marcos, Jorge, and can back that up.

Well, I'm a shoo-in for at least third-runner-up in the Air Giving A Shit About This Contest Contest.

Thanks for a hearty afternoon laugh, scotteb.

I'm gonna take Atlantis Morrissey out back and get it pregnant.

SEAL! I get it!

Keen!
This'll make my ear bud a golden receiver!

These Slim Jims are making me thirsty!

Nurse Betty reference.
Intentional?

Hmm.
Isn't "The Best of Whose Line is it Anyway?" an oxymoron?

(Monica Lewinsky walks out)

Fuck it, book Madison Square Garden.
Build a Thunderdome-style steel cage, maybe get Tina Turner to walk around in one of the luxury boxes if you wish, but we're settling this once and for all.