Diego Luna
I always thought he looked like a twelve-year-old, which made the end of Y Tu Mama Tambien awfully awkward (particularly when his skinny, featureless, Leonardo DiCaprio body just exacerbates the image).

They say "colossally self-absorbed alcoholic"
like it's a bad thing.

Is that Amy Grant?

Well, Stuff N Fluff, if you're unable to close your mouth in an 'o' around anything cylindrical, you're of no use to me for the time being.

Why is "The Rambis Youth" so funny a phrase?

You guys had better hope Mr. Decimal doesn't hear this filthy slander. He'll punch you all the way to the 700s!

So all I have to do is dress up like a monkey, and someone will PAY me to repeatedly jerk off into the gravy bin at KFC?

I'll hold out for their next promotion, when they turn from KFC to KOC (Kentucky Obnoxious-Sounds-Coming-From-The-Stall-As-You-Spend-The-Rest-of-the-Day-Screaming-On-The-Toilet Chicken).

A Smell of Honey, A Swallow of Brine
Suddenly my lady's and my nicknames for each other don't seem so unique.

Mostly sobbing and pleas for release, but still.

Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?

What, The Dark Knight?

Sounds like the plot of that one Sandra Bullock movie, While You Were Sleeping.

But, back to the story of a one night stand,
I thought I was strong, but she was He-man!
Lovin' every second tryin' to make me blush,
And all in all it was for the lust,
I though, she was an angel and soft as a cream puff
Until I seen her come out with the whip and handcuffs.
Breathin' down my neck, I was scared to death
The…

Oh my god, what have I got into?
Sooner or later I thought she'd get the clue,
When my body was tired and full of sweat and perspire,
The situation I was in could'a start a CAMPFIRE!
Just mackin' and schemin' on a woman I thought was cool,
But now I realize that the Ice was the fool.
'Cause a woman will play you, lay you…

We're all Jung at heart, I believe.

NEEDS MOAR SPANDAU BALLET.

I feel like you're repeating yourself as an artist.

I'm sure there's an eloquent point to be made here…
…about the dichotomy between our facade of disaffected, above-it-all natures with our stated disdain for the tastes of others, and the tenacity with which we study reports like the Nielsens to take glee in how many (or how few) other people watch the same shows as we.

On today's episode, Leslie and Brigitte swap stories of hanging around with O.J. and Flav, before they get the bright idea to fix the plumbing WITHOUT CALLING A PROFESSIONAL! Be sure to miss it!