And bring back Who’s Your Daddy?

That creepy owl clock was keeping the prison really safe.

Well, you can't have the United Kingdom. There's already people living there.
They'll think you're going to pinch their benefits.

For research purposes.

That was amazing. I had to pause it after the first scene with the Velma joke, while she was carrying them up the stairs, 'cause I was literally laughing for two minutes straight. It was one of the most hysterical things I've seen all year.

Hey, alls I was doing was trying to help.
The least you could do is apologize and go 50/50 with me on this timeshare.

She really shouldn't be having so much screen time. It's not like she's eventually gonna become more tolerant and friendly; like it usually happens with these type of characters on tv shows. She's always gonna be Miss Piggy; so they should use her only as a supporting character.
She does occasionally have funny lines:

-But I thought that grudge was replaced by the Natalie Portman grudge for stealing Black Swan?
-That was just a decoy grudge. It's always been Witherspoon, ……… always.

-You want your baby seat?
-Yes, please.

We know how to butter bread!

Is he 'avin' a laugh?

Oh my Goooood!!!!

I don't think we can be 100% certain that Tower Joe saw Patti.

-You're making Boyle feel bad on purpose. He's Elvis!
-Yes!!
-Elvis Stojko. The Canadian figure skater.
-Nooo!!

-You think he's overconfident enough?
-I'm the smartest man alive! I'm never gonna die!

Hey, I guess you're new at this.
Someone will have to show you the ropes.

"You're not so tough without cheeseman around, are you?
Well, it's too late. It's too late for all of you. Ahahahahaha!!! … oh, and could get a reference letter?"

"There's a giant Roman-shaped blind spot in the way that Roman sees things."

Hey, girl. I just wanna get real for a moment. And say that while we love being superstars, the real reason we do this… is for you. For you specifically. Not the girl sitting next to you. But you.

I lost it when they revealed the culprit, and the entire audience in the theater just happened to know his name: "Jasper Crawl?!!!"