It's the final countdown!

A. V. Club: Please…flood my comment with Wikipedia definitions of what Shoegaze is.

Nailed it!

It's my "porn name".

Judging by the stupid amount of appearances from famous people, the audience filled with said famous people cheering during this thing is going to be deafening.

Great. Now I'm depressed. Thanks.

Buy a suit. If you gonna be impotent, you might as well dress impotent.

"Honey, I Shrunk the Animal Crackers"

You were smoking near the free range animal crackers?! PETA is going to have you for breakfast my friend.

That was quick.

"Hey Steve, I got an excellent opportunity for you. The good news is you'll be next to Katy Perry on stage at the Super Bowl."
"Oh my god, really?! That is amaz…wait a second…what is the bad news?"

I love that mirror he is looking at.

A. V. Club: God's loophole!

To the Nicholas Cave!

{Insert "Lame Claim to Fame" joke here}

13 Mockingbirds

"Yippe Kei Yai, mockingbird!"

Starring Corey Feldman. They'll make hundreds!

A. V. Club: 7" worthy!

Stupid people should only apply to jobs that start with trucker?