Dammit! You should have given Open House a chance!

I have to agree. It had some amusing moments — like the aforementioned "Zoo Animals on Wheels" — but mostly it's a mess, and usually one that's not funny. It's not necessarily that Chris Elliot plays a jerk; it's that he overacts to a painful, distracting degree.

And Jesus said: "It is not what goes into a man's mouth that defiles him, it is what proceeds out." (Pours Cheddar Chex Mix over face)

Now do it with the Pedestrian Riot cheat on.

They all descend from a 1967 TV show called "Coronet Blue," which was about a man fished from the East River struggling to rediscover his identity. The show was picked up by CBS, abruptly dropped, then aired as a summer series where it became an unexpected hit (and couldn't go to a second season, as the first had been…

I'm not Jon Hamm! He exploded! Wowza!

The Berenstain Bears Smite the Worshippers of Baal

The Berenstain Bears and the Days of Wine and Roses

It gets better: Streep's character is dying, and they're all being pursued by vigilantes trying to drive the homeless out of Albany.

Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room is also a deeply entertaining (albeit infuriating) film. It suffers somewhat from the fact that it came out before the trials, where Ken Lay (depicted, at best, as being disconnected from the turmoil going on around him) got in lawyers' faces and proved his own worst witness.

Jobs was a great marketer, but if there wasn't a huge audience of Apple acolytes ready to consume the company's products, the press wouldn't have been there. From 1984 to 1997, they weren't.

Pirates of Silicon Valley, along with Jobs himself, is responsible for the deeply mistaken perception that the history of personal computing is essentially a dance-off between Apple and IBM (with Microsoft eventually replacing the latter). The Commodore 64 outsold both companies' products through the 80s and is…

So, how does it compare to Saturday the 14th?

Ah, good point. Fixed.

You're wondering how he eats and breathes
And other science facts? (La La La)
Then repeat to yourself "Well, Android sucks,
I should really use this Mac"

"“We need it to understand the world the way you and I do: as objects and relationships between objects.
We Kant do that.

No Jerry Van Dyke in Coach = No Robert Duvall in The Godfather

Seconds later, a pile of "Nothin' My Love Can't Fix" singles explodes.

"My God, NBC is killing it! Greenlight Ow, My Balls!"

No no — she formerly played Billy Bob Thornton. In the series, she gives advice to the current Billy Bob Thornton, Mira Sorvino.