Pam's Mom….
…looks great for 58. I hope I look that good.

Big fish little pond all the way. I have big ambitions, but not the drive or talent. I'll take feeling superior to those around me instead.

Whoa, Phyllis is looking sexy as the fortune teller.

I thought it was Boo Ok. :(

I love Alton Brown
But he's lost too much weight. Look skeletal. Go back to ice cream and chili cheese fries.

This was my favorite movie when I was a kid — I was 6 when it came out. My parents were pretty twisted.

Good news everyone! The Master does not approve!

How about Torgo does all the voices?

Sam Adams? I didn't know Portland, OR's mayor worked for the AV Club.

Second!

I thought I was the only who felt that way! I hated this film, which is a shame, as I like most of the actors, and I enjoyed Flirting with Disaster.

Stranger than Fiction is rad. This movie blows. Also: I majored in English.

I feel like a new toothbrush.

Clamp clamp ba-bamp!

Ow my head! Ow my feet! Ow my head! Ow my feet!

I was looking for Kelly, too. I thought it'd be cute to see her play volleyball or complain about playing volleyball or something.

Maybe the horse doctor could help Pam?

My sister did make a mix tape for our dad's funeral. It was weird. There was a song about pixie dust. This might have been better.

It was all Neil Diamond at my parents' funerals. I think I'll go with Fish Heads for Mine. Not Phish, though, then I'd have to come back and shank a bitch.

I fucking love Waiting. I think Cook is pretty good in it, but that character is the same as all of his other "characters." There's just a lot less.