Republicans aren't libertarians. Jefferson wasn't a federalist. You're just throwing words out there, bro.

Quality-wise, we're looking to land somewhere between Lord of the Rings and a Command & Conquer cut scene.

It's just Judith Light doing acoustic Sebadoh covers.

Increasing the overall diversity of the Academy is a fantastic compromise. Minorities get represented among the nominees but white members don't actually have to recognize them. Racism solved!

No, it's an indie dramedy with Judith Light.

"Shit fucking buffalo cunt, sarsparilla!"

Calamity Jane on Deadwood was like a nails-on-chalkboard parody of Rene Zellweger's horrendous Oscar-bait performance from Cold Mountain.

Linda Belcher is the best part of Bob's Burgers and perfect in every way. Yes, she's an awful person, but what would you expect from Louise's mother?

Frankly, I expected more nuance from adherents of a weltanschauung premised on an evolutionary psychoanalysis of girls who go clubbing.

I want to know whose ass it is and why it's farting!

In some cases, they have to periodically use these properties to keep the rights. It's like when Nick Jr. adapted the Beatrix Potter stories into a semi-satirical political mockumentary starring Debi Mazar as Secretary of Homeland Security.

Warner Bros.: 17 Years of Matrix Tint and Counting!

"The woman had a lasso. It made you tell the truth. She had gold bracelets with stars on them. The bracelets deflected bullets. She had an invisible jet. I sat with her in the invisible jet and drank coffee. We flew over the cane fields near Asuncion.

"The men are talking, Patty."

Unfortunately, Heart of the City couldn't stand up to the quadruple threat of mid 80s masturbatory fuel that was Bea Arthur, Betty White, Estelle Getty and Rue McClanahan.

Was she spinning gracefully in a gingham sundress, bathed in the soft light of a Saturday afternoon?

Tales from the Crypt also inspired me to stop selling bogus insurance plans to homicidal rednecks.

Surprisingly terrible. This could be an ad for the Directors' Guild.

They're entering a statistical sweet spot for the disease. 2016-19 are going to be brutal.

They're just aware of the possibility that someone, somewhere will try to make money off this. In fact, Madonna basically already used the opportunity to send out a promotional tweet for her latest album.