*Calls 911, disregards what they say, shoots Stupid Ass*

That totally gratuitous dig at the Suffrage Movement was startling.

There was some backlash after Vago tried to go O'Neal in a previous newswire.

This is what you've been reduced to after Peter Jackson wouldn't return your calls?

Goddamn.

*Fat Christopher

Go on…

Go Benjy Go Benjy Go

The Chumscrubber or nothing brah.

They should cast her as April, just to freak out the nerd wanking crowd.

Newsmen are indeed a dying breed.

fahawakqods (sic)

Don't even get him started…

Goddamn you, now I can't get Pete Campbell sex moaning out of my head.

….and that boy grew up to be a noteworthy AVC comment contributor.

ooohhh!

Who the hell is John F. Kennedy?

"Hahaha Welcome to Earf"

Salame!

Even the fire-and-brimstone preachers are usually tactful enough to say "no one except God knows" or something vague like that when talking about the souls of the departed.  It's easy to see how condemning people to hell (while the nation is still mourning them) would have sent Don over the edge.