I know, right? I only have 2.8 million dollars.

Expanding the Ghost Dad franchise with Ghost Babysitter is exactly the image turn-around that will save Bill Cosby!

*Checks under bed for Tyrannosaurus rex; remains relatively unconcerned as to stegosaurus*

"Well, I don't want Fop, goddammit. I'm a Dapper Dan immortal mutant."

A plague on both your houses of Congress!

This is where fan fiction really shines, to fill in the gaps. Like how right now I'm writing in the octopus scene. It involves Andy and Stef, and has a strong hentai influence.

The auction also includes a hat once owned by Fatty Arbuckle. Something something Bill Cosby.

How much for the remains of a munchkin?

*Quietly shutters "Roman Polanski's Chili Hut"*

Your implication that Shakespeare's plays were actually written by Barack Obama just reeks of elitist snobbery.

Well this clearly requires a comparative tasting. To the bourbonery!
*Runs to strip club*

For daily use I favor Bulleit; extremely good for it's price point. Though lately I have been preferring their rye to their bourbon.

You can always just burn a garish sweater.

I have expressed my concern about the lack of upvotes on this comment to all of my member commenters. (Resolution adopted at UberMitch, General Assembly, San Diego, United States, November 20, 2014.)

NEWSFLASH: Petty shoplifting up 0.8% globally

*Then three year-old UberMitch attempts to replicate; succumbs to alcohol poisioning*

I'm seeing double! Two hundred eighty-eight Terrys!

And an official biography, no less. Probably even leaves out all the fun Suge Knight-related bits.

ADVENTURES NEED CHOOSING!

DALE-GHAZI!!!