But he will be narrating the transactions using that haunting tone from the video.

Synaptic entanglement. My god, when you think he can't come up with any more body horror imagery…

If I only had the money to shop.

Using umbrellas, I assume.

If it's that family pictured, no.

If they filmed at my house, we would have some. We like to make up lyrics to theme songs that don't have words.
"It's time for the X-Files," is a personal favorite.

And you don't even get to watch the show they're watching.

I honestly think my dad would be horrified by that show. Of course, he watches RFE, the rural channel.

When I got cable back, I realized Bravo has a show called "Below Deck," about a cruise ship crew. 
A bunch of my friends went to work at Yosemite Park after high school. I'm waiting for the inevitable show about that.

My episode would be me sitting in my underwear drinking wine, laughing way too loud.

@Merve2:disqus  That was the point of calling them fleshlights.

They never come down?

I'll be the smart ass, talking, alcoholic dog.

My coffeemaker is broken.

James Dean. Grace Kelly.

I said "buoys."

I read it that way, too. I would think for clarity's sake, you would use the term LSD in a review.

It's probably not a barrel of laughs, though.

My husband loves it. I used to, but I got tired of it. For something quick and easy, I just pour spicy stir-fry sauce on it and cook it down until it's not too mushy but chewy enough.

It always does!