I'd be more jealous if he was going to AVN in Vegas.

That shit's dry as dirt. Give me the grease-bomb extra crispy any day.

After that glowing review you give them a B??? I give your grades an F, A.V. Club!

Preferably a stage with a pole.

Yer runnin' outta gas there red.

Truth be told, I'd prolly still do her.

Ahhhh, whither Mike Tyson.

Does Debbie Gibson finally show her tits in this? We've waited so long for to work her way down to soft core level. She's going to be past her expiration date soon so she needs to get crackin'.

Semimax?

The irony was intentional ya mouth breather.

Sorry what? I heard "Kate Beckinsale side-butt and leg" and I jizzed - in - my - pants.

I always wondered if Chang would quit or be felled by some bizarre ailment stemming from his fearless consumption of repugnant vittles. Now we know.

Does any of the 300% unnecessary content added to the Underworld Trilogy involve nudity by Kate Beckinsale? I would rather enjoy seeing that.

How long have you been waiting to use that line?

Now listen here ya shrimp, quit making waves.

I fast forward to the scene where the cross-eyed chick shows her tits then when that's over I fast forward to the end.

Chris Rock and Robin Williams in a slapstick, riff-tastic, ad-lib in a laugh out loud melange that delivers the massage that despite our differences we are all more alike than we realize.

I see an indecent exposure arrest in your future.

Jarmusch looks like he should be a member of the X-Men.

I totally didn't expect the bit where young Kirk fathers Picard's grandfather. I thought that was a bit of stretch.