Things Jesus can't do:
Eat M&M's, swat at flies,
be a hand model.

Vexing over vivacious vixens and virility
Read them all because
I was trying to get laid.
I heart high school girls!

A Death Sentence for Punctuality
How shall I perish
Will I succumb to the flames,
Cancer-aids, or both?

Confluence of Camels and Carnality
But if kids don't smoke,
What are they supposed to do
After they have sex?

Popularity of Amateurs Approaches Infinity
Don't Stop Believing
Sung By Peter, Quagmire
Joe and Cleveland Brown

Unbearable Nature of Existance without Meaning or Purpose
My Wii is quiet
collecting dust, post zelda
and where is Wii Sex?

Mortality and Cancer-aids
Where is the Firstie?
Did it die in a fire
like those listed here?

Summers Warm Embrace
Buffy in college
learning about life and shame
Parker wrecked that shit