It's not easy…

She is simply certain that Turner is a Kahvorka [turns head, spits].
I believe she is right.

But the whole place is filled with tools already!

"Th-th-That's All, Folks!"

"HENDERSON!" [screen goes black]

"Vhat is dat? Velvet? Dat's beautiful fabric!"

"Well, the price of eggs has bottomed out, so Ethel and I are going to hang ourselves from the barn rafters after this here broadcast.
Ain't that right, Ethel?"
[Off-Screen] "That's right, Henry! You go first and I'll foller!"
(returns to musing about what she'll do with the insurance money
after Henry dies in a tragic…

CRAAACK THAT WHIP!

I could probably do that with a paper-bag hand puppet public access show at this point.

When the TV is telling you to go the fuck to sleep, already, you go the fuck to sleep. ;-)

R. I. P. Rowdy Roddy. I will always love him for They Live.

Most of us are on other peoples' lists of "issues."

Goodbye and Good Luck, Caroline! You're a wonderful writer and we will miss you.

Well, it's a weekend. It's not like we're supposed to be working or anything. ;-)

I mean the original "mountain dew."

I got what I was told was a "mild" case of dysentery in Saudi Arabia from Syrian lettuce that, as it turned out, had been fertilized with human shit. I begged the guys in my tank crew to shoot me, but they were all too sick and weak. Good times!
I hope you feel better soon.

"Barkeep, I'd like you to pour eight hefty measures of your most flagrantly intoxicating liquors into a large glass and make it taste like a refreshing summer beverage!" Long Island Iced Teas are The Most Dangerous Cocktails In The World when made by an expert.

But first take that peppermint schnapps and pour it all down the shower drain. It will clear the pipes and leave a brisk, refreshing scent.
What, did you have a girl over or something? ;-)

Yeah, just like that pile of coke got there all by itself.

More like livestock. Vide Supra ;-)