I thought Cab Calloway was stored in a lockbox and brought out only to play Joe Jackson.

I thought the Shake and Vac was the name of a discount abortion clinic.

Those aren't grapes, they're hemorrhoids.

True. A guy finds a woman attractive. That would make you wonder if you were a big fan…

Oh come on. That one was unoriginal and prosaic. Every time I see one of you fawning over this Caruso hack my mind plops you into that category reserved for those who purchase Susan Lucci's Malibu Pilates contraption and who plunk down $30 or more to watch Paul Blart Mall Cop then rush home to watch According to Jim.

The troll seems to have the gimmick down.

…and ET was copied from a turd Spielberg found in a public toilet.

"I sampled some fruits of Carlos' vine during my tour of his winery but I don't remember how it tastes."

Away We Go? Is that movie with the guy from the office and his pregnant mom riding around in the stereotypical beat up Volvo while wearing thrift store corduroy clothing?

This one was a softball. I want to see Caruso apply himself to something challenging.

DRAW BLOOD!

@warren - my greatest frustration with Headbanger's Ball was the SOD for the intros but never an actual SOD vid. Hell, I would've taken MOD too. But no, we got White Lion, Slaughter, Firehouse, Kix and that kind of shit.

They should go for a celebrity endorsement. Call them Jada Pinkett's Favorite Treasures.