Indeed- they are inert, and therefore incapable of even the most rudimentary reasoning.

My generation is at last redeemed!

Likewise seek not such superior provender in the British Isles. But France is not convenient for casual dining, and they will persist in their deplorably wanton conduct when you visit their shores, so that a woman of reputation must travel all the way down to blessed London if she wants a decent andouillette or…

Although the colours hurt our eyes and the texture is, if the reference above is in any way accurate, composed of marrow-meal, sulphur and deadly nightshade, that in no way indicates that the products are in fact an abomination. Although they have every appearance of being an abomination…

"Nothing in the world has ever been artificial… It may be good or evil, but assuredly it is not artificial: vanity is a voice out of the abyss.”
-G. K. Chesterton

Well then, bless her heart.

I recently had occasion to view 'Dial M For Murder' where the young lady in question is menaced by a frightful adventurer armed with a stocking re-purposed for chilling murderous deeds! But Mrs. K. is not having any of it, bless her, and puts paid to the villain with such pluck and precision that I was given to cry…

I have been where I often am- the secluded rooms in the hidden halls of my manor where I enjoy sufficient privacy to pursue my quite unlikely but nonetheless undeniable triumphs in the field of advanced temporal/visual steam technology. To my great consternation, a small adjustment I made on one of the…

You dear little charming Persian Owl!

Oh dear, you have (with the best of intentions, I am quite sure) revealed information that I should not in fact know, communicating as I do from what you would consider to be a much earlier era through a mechanism of my own design. Knowing now that it is in fact the wicked scourge of cholera that does me in, can I…

Overgenerous to a fault! First a world of abundant sugared dairy cream, and now the acquisition of an 'ordinary' for my own use? What a wonderfully full heart you have, fit to burst! Although, to drift delicately towards what might be construed as a minor obstacle to your generosity, I am of course communicating…

'Dowager'?!? I will have you know my husband, although quite mad and now confined to the bricked-up rookery in the north tower remains very much alive! I will thank you not to spread rumours regarding my status, sir. The last thing I need is a parade of beastly suitors who hunger not so much for my person, as for…

It is unfortunate when a creator deliberately chooses to limit themselves only to those characters who do not have magical arrows and deplorable conduct towards other races, but I can understand the desire to avoid repeating oneself. My new charwoman has a deficiency in her left ear (happily obscured from casual…

Ohh, yes, let's!

Would you make a married woman blush, sir? If such was your goal, then it is well-won. Only decorum, propriety and the terrible, unbridgeable chasm between our respective eras prevents a modest display of my appreciation for your kind words.

Pray, do, for the restoration of the monarchy over the upstart colonies.

Who does he believe himself to be, the Heavenly Upstart Hong Xiuquan, younger brother of Jesus Christ and architect of the most costly civil conflict in recorded history? As I recall he believed that angels had scooped out his bowels and replaced them with a precious mineral substitute as a precondition to his divine…

As in many things American, laudable enthusiasm tragically undercut by dubious judgement.

I commend your sentiment while simultaneously deploring your grammar!

It is almost as though the gentleman desired to be struck.