After finally beating Breath of the Wild two days ago, I have no idea what I'm doing with my life from here on forwards.

I think I still have this game somewhere at my parents house. I haven't thought about it in twenty years.

Enhance…. [flips down giant orange handle]

Every year, this website becomes better at telling me I am An Old.

PLATONIST!

What, you don't develop on Microsoft Bob? It's the hippest thing in the .NET world these days.

That old, familiar sting of buyer's remorse.

Sweet. I'll add that to my C.V.

At the risk of sounding like Xanderpuss, I'm really attracted to middle aged women, and I'm comfortable saying that I think Sandra Bullock is infinitely more attractive now than she was in her twenties (when she was still a very attractive lady).

He was easily the size of three John Leguizamos.

I used to work with a guy who wore exclusively Big Dog T-Shirts. He
probably owned at least 35 different ones, each with a pop culture pun
more insipid than the last. An example: a Big Dog is wearing a gi, and
undeneath is written the words, "Bruce Leash." We always referred to
him by the nickname Big Dog, except…

Jean-Paul Blartre: Mall Existentialist

I'm still close to a decade away from 37, but somehow I think I'm already too old to go to a nightclub.

The first time I watched this movie, there were multiple times where I laughed so hard that I was afraid I might not breathe and would die.

I thought this was going to involve the makers of Final Fantasy and was disappointed.

If I understand this correctly, it seems this thing combines all of the best features of the Atari Flashback and the Ouya.

I don't miss much from my brief stint living in Texas, but I definitely miss WhataBurger.

Mischief Makers is my favorite unsung classic on the N64. The moment where I first realized what that game was really going for was in a boss fight fairly early on where you're riding a cat whose riding a missile, fighting a lupine cyborg riding motorcycle.

Why is this up, it's not Friday yet, it's still Thursday? Wait, no, it's technically Friday, but only because it's after midnight. Why am I still awake!? What is compelling me not to go to sleep? I hate the internet. That is all. Constructive commentary on video games to follow in the morning if I can manage not…

NOTOK. I was really hoping for something I could run on my old Amiga.