Not knowing Bill Maher's an insecure, pancake make-up wearing, middle brow (at best) bitch is on you. You sound like the pop culture equivalent of a science-denier on something so universally agreed upon.

This reminds me of the only line I remember from Garbage Pail Kids the Movie: "Don't shake hands with Messy Tessy."

That's where several of the shows are!

"Ashamed of the Story I Told" as covered by the National is pretty great.

*pulls John aside to explain the mandatory minimum snark required by proper AV Club etiquette…then gently reasons why it's reasonable to invoke the term "Caribbean Queef" here*

Little Nicky would hate it, then proceed to somehow rewire the NES to tase Dick Tremayne, much to the delight of all sheriff's office employees and audience.

"Shart of Darkness."

Perhaps Whitney Cummings said it best:

At first glance I thought the headline was Paula Deen clogging the toilet.

I did the same thing at both Champaign and Iowa City (beta). Unimpressed by Champaign and the house there, we proceeded to trash the place because, you know, because they were good enough to host us.

Jesus wore sandals so that I could wear some too.

http://www.youtube.com/watc…

Whatever you do, don't tell that to White Blackula. Or do.

Bullshit. Carmelo Anthony is easily the best crossword player of the three.

Maybe then he can afford to turn his daughter's bedroom back into the computer room.

By saying this mashup is what Toronto needs to start "laughing through the tears" you appear to share EliHawk's penchant for melodrama.

Cocaine's a helluva drug.

In "the not-too-distant future", eugenics is common, and DNA plays the primary role in determining social class. A genetic registry database uses biometrics to instantly identify and classify those so created as "valids" while those conceived by traditional means and more susceptible to genetic disorders are…

Perhaps Angela Lansbury could replace Octavia Spencer as Serenity Johnson in a failed reboot of Halfway Home (the failed original).

Moving as this is, I might humbly suggest adding Ted Nugent as an additional villain, who is pushed in front of a speeding train. Then, ice cream.