'Whats your friend's name?'
'Kenneth. I mean…I'll tell you what his name is. It's…Kenneth.'

And so do the stars of said DVDs.

I always laugh when I think of the scene of Kent using a yard stick to make sure the books on his shelf line up properly and then, a few scenes later on the same day, he's doing it again.

I remember my mom asking me if I had heard the new Santana song when it came out. I said I hadn't and she said she had just heard it on the radio. I said, 'you just heard a new Santana song…on the radio?' It seemed like such an unlikely thing and then, of course, the song and the album totally blew up.

Easton and Mike Campbell of the Heartbreakers are the kings of the perfect pop guitar solo. Just enough flair for the radio, just enough substance to warrant being there, and enough technique to please the folks who are actually listening, all played cleanly with great tone.

We're beyond mass and matter here. Beyond even energy. What we're back to is the first thought.

Eyebrows.

No good hooks so far on her new tracks. Katy has at least been always reliable for dumb fun, but her recent incarnation is mostly just dumb.

I used to cook with lard quite a bit and then out of nowhere my doctor was like, 'hey, you know your cholesterol is, like, super-high' and I was all 'that's good, right?' and he was all 'nah cuz' and now I've been on a diet all year that has been good for my waistline, but killing my taste buds. I won't know how much…

If it was a soap opera character, it could be all three things.

Do I have to get it in chicka-cherry-colaburst or Sonoma sunburst or whatever or can I just get it a regular color like a goddamn Fender?

Zars St. Lars is great fake name for a wannabe rock star.

Mmmm that gets my pod racing.

I've long since thought about which of my likes would be an instant deal-breaker if someone said they didn't like it to me. I went on a first/only date with a woman who said she didn't like movies and specifically going to the movies, but I stuck it out for our entire meal. That was a shitty date because the food also…

The cut back to the jar was great. Wareheim inserting some Tim & Eric-ness in there.

I had a first/only date with a girl in college who immediately ended the date after I said I didn't like Bon Jovi. She seriously put her hands palm-side down on the table of the cafe we were at, said 'we can't be friends' and got up and left. Probably for the best, but really threw me for a loop.

I concur. I'm very glad I met my wife just before the rise of dating apps. I would never have survived.

Reasonable move, terrible approach. He just launched his face at hers.

Plus PRS guitars, which I always thought were needlessly expensive, but the playability is evident in latter-day Santana. It is so (forgive me) smooth. I still prefer the swampier sound he got in the late '60s & '70s when he was playing (I think) mostly Les Pauls, but he certainly never lost his touch through the…

They should cook them with lard in a skillet like my grandmother used to do. Still the best burgers I ever ate.