Adobe-brand lotion.

Is he wearing one of those stupid Phiten necklaces in that picture?

Not as funny as Anne Hathaway as an astronaut. Or a medical engineer who is sent into space to repair a satellite.

In other "news", Woody Allen has no interest in making a monster movie. Must be a slow news day.

Like how The Big Lebowski and Saving Private Ryan are similar because they both use human actors and came out in 1998.

Added to my Netflix queue!

They should use this opportunity to establish a "Boston Marathon Bombing" universe, with a cast of characters that could be used in sequels and spin-offs.

NEVER FORGET!!! When something painful happens, it's important to keep poking and picking at the wound so it doesn't heal. Never forget, and never move on.

It's time this story got a gritty reboot.

You can't make good rock music once you give up the booze and drugs.

It's not "Fightin' 'Round the World"? #disappointing

Him is more stupider.

Doesn't the twitter machine have a way to shut this whole thing down?

Unlike most other years.

Is there any reason for this to exist at all?

And Trirstrarm Shapeeeroo!

A lot of Americans live in rural areas where dial-up is the only kind of internet available.

Or they live in rural areas where there is no other option.

Like white internet, but with better rhythm.

You know, Ken! That guy who was always throwing AOL discs. Everyone knows Ken.