That was horrifying.  Yes, I love John Candy as much as the next person, but I'm going to have to pretend I never watched that.

That's one way to interpret modern gender relations.  Here's another: men, finding it less socially acceptable to treat women as objects due to women becoming less willing to put up with their shit, long for the days when they didn't have to control their "impulses" as much, and equate the new standard of behavior…

Indeed.  I thought it was clever!  A send-up of our expectations.  A fine bit of word play.

Beaver balls, salted beaver balls for sale!

Geeze, Cookie Monster.  You make it sound like you've never fantasized about melting into a puddle at the initiation of lovemaking.  Everybody has that fantasy, right?

GODDAMMIT I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT WAS CLOSER THAN THIS!

Obviously.  An act is a subdivision of a play.  If you have two plays labelled Part I and Part II, they'd both have separately numbered acts.

So you're saying he was taking his shirt off for Jesus?

I'm no math teacher, but I'd check those equations again if I were you.

This meme would never have started if they were truly terrible.

Smæt.

Unfortunately, we just aren't that good.  Some other board may be that good, but we ourselves are flawed creatures.

It's Christmas in Laurel Canyon tonight.

It's a short step from "my kingdom for a horse" to "anarchy in the UK."

My friends and I have an inside joke about a dystopian future where cultural historians try to piece together the three greatest cultural achievements of American music, and they come up with jazz, rock n' roll, and dubstep.

Which happened in the late 70s and 80s.  When I say "rock establishment" I'm generally talking about the press and other "tastemakers".  Rock musicians eventually incorporated disco into their sound, but that was more of a fad than anything else: disco-flavored rock fell out of favor more or less at the same time that…

Maybe that's Dershowitz's plan.

And that's it?

And that makes muppets cry.

It actually works quite well, in theory.  The law does not regard a prostitute's profession as a blanket consent to all sex acts.  A prostitute has to actually give consent, and that consent can have whatever conditions she (or he) wants attached.  Even if that condition is tied to illegal activity, failing to meet…