Corrected to Michael, not Chris. Damn, my morning coffee isn't working any more.

I'd consider that more of a series of short trips into Mexico rather than one sporadic trip. But that's just pedantic little ol' me.

Soon this article will show up in the Taboola sponsored links sidebar of another AV Club article and the fabric of reality will disintegrate.

Isn't Koresh that dude on Heroes that turned into a bug or something?

Well, come on, if you're going to count every actor who can claim that…

To this day I have a strangely earnest, unironic love for "No Myth". I never bought any of Michael Penn's albums and never heard another song of his, but that one song is probably still on my phone today.

It would be much more disturbing had you absorbed your twin at the age of three months.

It's okay, my imaginary daughter dresses like Grady from Sanford and Son.

Fusilli will F you silly.

At least you didn't Arzt yourself.

What is a sporadic trip to Mexico? They have a hotel in El Paso and just keep going across the border?

Where do the reverse vampires come in?

He said FOOD.

The Warren Commission acknowledged that pissing off Sinatra is a known form of suicide.

Well, just saying that I would have definitely been looking over my shoulder if I thought I'd snubbed Sinatra back in the day. I don't think I'd heard this idea before, but it seems relatively plausible for a wacko conspiracy theory.

It's a close second to not making a new pot of coffee after taking the last cupful.

My wife and I used to always order nachos for an appetizer at this Mexican restaurant, but the jalapenos were too hot for her and she picked them off. We ordered it once without the peppers but even she admitted it was way too bland then. I'm sure it looked stupid to the staff, but it really did add some great flavor.

When you watch that episode, urine tears by the end.

IMCREEPYPASTABLE

The closest I've seen in the games so far, I think, is when you have to back-trace the sniper bullets in Arkham City. That wasn't very satisfying, though, and I think that it could be much better.