At first I thought the GOP would want to deploy the military to kill anything that is attacking innocent Americans, but then I remembered that women who are pregnant probably had sex and are therefore not innocent.

Where are my bitches?

I want to go home and watch that tonight.  It'll be my first time re-watching an episode!

Not if she didn't call 'em "ketchips."

Past, present, future…

Happy Frivolous Lawsuit Day, everyone!

"Cheating is cheating, in any walk of life and in any manner"

He's awfully pasty, I bet he wouldn't even fill up a Vespa.

That and "DC has strict gun control, just goes to show you gun control doesn't work!"

The only thing that can stop a Congressman with a gun is a good guy with a gun?

Well of course Exxon couldn't pay their interns, they only make $100 million a day so there really isn't any money to spare for anyone who is a student!

*slidewhistle*

Don't make a mountain out of a meh-hill.

I came here looking for Enchanted Goatse, I am disappointed and would like to sue!

Now cruder than ever!

I didn't remember that was still on.

There is no cure for CamperAIDS.

Pervy Obit!  Where are you!?!?!?

A Subway footlong is $5 in Subtember.  One Euro is currently equivalent to $1.36.  Face wants to explain to his French friends how many Euros one meter of sub would cost.

That reminds me, Kirk, you never turned in your trig assignment.  I'm assuming it's because you were at your 40th birthday party instead of doing homework?