Stayed tuned to find out if they can save Garrett!

I don't get carsick.  I can ride rollercoasters all day with a stomach full of greasy fried food and yet…

You mean a flying mammal bat not a baseball bat, right?

The Herpes Tree: like The Giving Tree, only better.

Scarlett Johansson plays an alien visitor who…helped…bewigged…Scottish people…have sex with me.

A commenter got an online dating message from a guy who said basically "Hi do you mastrabulate?"

You know, I always wondered what Dock Jensen was from but never cared enough to ask.  Am I correct in inferring that Dock Jensen is from Lost?

I was going to say something but was distracted by your avatar and started drooling.

Go back to mastrabulating at your desk.

I dislike cinnamon rolls.  COME AT ME, BROS.

But then we'll miss out on all the Cinnabon adventures!

Why don't you just tell me the state where you want to manage a Cinnabon?

The unmarked graves make my heart hurt.

Forget the idea of a prequel, I really want this to be the spinoff.

"Who let Jesse change his clothes?"

But his voice is so gentle and soothing!

Ok, is this where I should mention that I think Bryan Cranston (clean shaven and with hair) is a total fox?

Too bad the cast of Breaking Bad didn't record an acceptance speech saying, "Sorry we couldn't come to the ceremony, we were busy watching ourselves be awesome!  If you can see this, we hope you were devastated by tonight's episode."

Oh my gosh it's going to be in Canton in a couple of months!

Everyone's favorite ride is Sploosh Mountain.