If you're lucky, he pisses on you first.

I don't know where to start.

And many SNL movies.

We call that the 'Robot Chicken' boundary.

FLAGGED.

McCloud!

Think bigger! Maybe something with a six in it.

Man, now I am hoping he's secretly filming the sequel to Soul Plane, but will release it as Atlas Shrugged II: Shruggier. The confusion the day of release will be *delicious.*

If you weren't a germophobe before, you would be after seeing it. You also become acutely aware of people coughing or sneezing around you for the next week.

More like Dane-ish Cook, amirite?

…You actually watched the Oscars?

And now I'm spending my time figuring out how to turn a Guitar Hero guitar into a bong. Can I outsource this to some irreverent teenagers?

Wait, 52 comments and not one person joking about France surrendering? C'mon, Internet, let's get our stereotypes in order.

It's his love affair with noir that keeps him from writing convincing female characters, so why bother with good actresses?

…Which is why Rotten Tomatoes is a terrible way to judge movies.

Yes, and it's a great read. Seattle was founded on *crazy.*

To steal a phrase from a friend, Howard will bring a certain sameness to the level of mediocrity.

Josh Holloway taking his shirt off and reading symbolic books on an Old West beach.

Your childhood imaginary friend was Karl Rove?

How can I say the visuals are inessential? Man, luckily I didn't say that. At all.