I totally recognized Senator Mitch McConnell as Mason Verger.

WHERE IS MY MONOCLE? GODDAMMIT.

FINAL SCENE, EPISODE ONE:

Will we still be getting Hobbit movies every Christmas? You can never have too many Hobbit movies.

A møøse once bit my sister.

I almost picked up Stephen R. Donaldson's "The Last Dark" yesterday, but realized that I'd completely forgotten everything that happened in the other "Last Chronicles of Thomas Covenant" books. There was time travel, or wormholes, or something. Right?

Zack Snyder deserves a face-punch for several things, not casting Rashida Jones as Lois Lane chief among them.

Hiddleston speaks passionately, eloquently and intelligently about Shakespeare and then he references The Bourne Ultimatum's twist and thus disproves Science by turning me gay for him. Is there anything this guy can't do?

No love for Colonel Raynor Sarnac, I see.

My God…it's full of "stars".

Terrified Criminal (shrieking): "WHAT ARE YOU??"

I'm a newly single dad (two kids - son, 9, daughter, 5) and would've been a shittier parent had I stayed married to my wife for "the kids' sake".

If this show were a 1970 Chevelle SS 454, it would be known as "Melba Toast".

It was an African moose, not a European one.

Moose jokes aren't funny, Zack. A moose once bit my sister.

Tony Thompson's drumming on "Modern Love" (and elsewhere - Power Station!) is a thing of (Bonhamesque) beauty.

You had me at "sympathetic boss Ted Levine", one of our greatest living "Oh, THAT Guy!" actors.

Coming soon: "Chicago: Chicago", starring Peter Cetera.

American Flagg!

I'm still disappointed that you never covered "Megaforce", Nathan. That said, what a great addition to pop culture writing this column and its iterations have been. In "real life" I'm a featured contributor at a fairly well-read pop culture site, and you've been a huge influence. Truly terrific work, sir. You'll be…