"Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Mom saw you jerked off in a sock."

I will buy a bottle of Sarah Newlin/Anna Camp and drink it. Please make this happen, yakuza!

We're watching the Sarah Newlin spinoff, right? I mean, praying to make it happen and THEN watch it, right?

I liked The Ring only because of the horse suicide scene. There are not enough horse suicides in the movies.

None of these is "Word Crimes" by Weird Al Yankovic. This list is invalidated due to blindness stemming from hipsterism

"Hey, Silverchair chick! Glad to meet you. Big fap. Big fap. I mean big FAN!"

I listened to the first album. It was so bad I begged a soldier to cut my ears off. Then Jesus healed my ears and I had to hear more. Asshole douchebag.

STOP! The Planet of the Apes! I want to get off!

As I named my first book of poetry "Star Wars", I feel you, Dinesh. Stoopid Google.

"As Clark, I could wear a hooded rain jacket. I may have to re-think this."

Aww, is Superman upset by a wittle bit of water?

What's up with Batman not shaving? Either grow a beard or not, Bruce.

I the South had won the Civil War, President Jefferson Davis woul have given us all hover boards by now.

Pop, pop!

White people go to movies this way. And black people go to movies this way.

As Brian mentions, of the six major cast members on "New Girl", three have dark skin. "New Girl" has broken new ground in the portrayal of Pixie-Americans, let's not bring down one group to uplift another.

Gumby Dammit, flavored with rubber, wire, and chewed cigars.

Hrrmmm. My body. Hrmm. Was never burned. So. Hmmm. I'm back as. Hrmm. As a White Walker here to take Tommy to college.

I always preferred this to Saving Private Ryan, which only had its first 15-20 minutes going for it before devolving to boring drama.

EPISODE 5 SPOILERS: Episode 2 will show Varys putting lettuce into Tyrion's cage holes, and fresh paper strips to replace the soiled ones.